Divorcing a Narcissistic Spouse
Divorcing a narcissistic spouse can be both challenging and emotionally draining as narcissists frequently are manipulative and controlling. Accordingly, it is important to approach your divorce from a narcissistic spouse with careful planning.
1. Consult with a Knowledgeable Attorney:
It is crucial to seek the assistance of a matrimonial attorney who has experience with narcissistic personalities. They can provide guidance on the legal aspects and strategies to protect your rights and interests despite your spouse’s narcissism.
2. Document Everything:
Keep detailed records – including audio and video recordings – of your interactions, communications, and incidents with your spouse. Document any instances of emotional, verbal, or physical abuse. Similarly, you should document any attempts by your spouse to manipulate or control you or the children. This documentation can be crucial evidence in legal proceedings.
3. Understand Your Finances:
Make sure you have a thorough understanding of your finances. Narcissistic spouses may manipulate finances during divorce proceedings, so you must safeguard your assets and understand the full extent of the marital estate.
4. Establish Boundaries:
Set clear boundaries with your spouse and try to limit communication to only essential matters.
5. Seek Emotional Support:
Divorcing a narcissistic spouse is extremely difficult emotionally. So, you should make sure to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist who can help you cope with the situation.
6. Safety First:
If there are any concerns about your or your children’s physical or emotional safety, prioritize your and their well-being. For example, consider obtaining an order of protection.
7. Protect Children:
Perhaps most importantly, if children are involved, prioritize their well-being. Narcissists will frequently put their own needs ahead of their children’s and, thus, put the children at risk. Document any instances of neglect or abuse of the children by your spouse and work with your attorney to create a parenting plan that is in the best interests of the children.
9. Prepare for Legal Proceedings:
Be prepared for a legal battle that is both lengthy and expensive. Your attorney can guide you on the best strategies to minimize the impact of your spouse’s narcissistic behavior on the outcome.
10. Maintain Self-Care:
Because divorcing a narcissistic spouse can be very draining, you must make sure to take care of yourself. For example, engage in activities that you enjoy, maintain a healthy lifestyle, and seek professional help when needed.